a little of this and that

I could hardly keep my eyes open after a very wonderful but exhausting BSB concert last night. I screamed so loud my voice was croaky and parched this morning. Hopefully, I can put some of my pictures up I haven't done that in a long time been getting so boring around here. I can't wait for the burden of this exam and its' attendant dilemma to leave me alone. It would be nice if I could see the light at the end of the tunnel but with this country and the state of the economy and the latent stupidity of the recruiting market, it doesn't seem likely.

But here's an update on my concert and everything else still to come:

BSB Concert

My concert last night was GREAT!!!

Super fun, lots of energy, very mature set up, remixes of all the old classics, and a different feel to the guys than before. No pyro unless it was absolutely necessary, no funky shoulder pad outfits, it felt like a farewell tour with the screen playing recaps of the last 12 years of their career, and their cameraderie was just superb. I loved it. I loved it more because I was not expecting to like it. I don't particularly dig all the new songs, but hearing them live, with them expressing how much they love the songs, made me like them. The dancing didn't feel forced, it felt like something they had to do to keep you watching, and it was more visual this time because you got to see it without all the pyro blocking your way. It was just superb. Those guys know how to throw it down, I hope they stick around for much longer. Seeing them together is always a thrill. Sometimes you think. one of them is okay, but nope, they should all be together, one without the other is just not having it.

The bad: the stage was set up so funky that this big ole light switch was blocking the monitor right where I was sitting. I felt so sorry for the people sitting a little more to the right, I was at an angle and yet it was blocking my way. Then, the organizers, Star 94 FM, the hugest dickheads you've ever seen. They didn't allow cameras. Who doesn't allow cameras and searches bags in this day and age? That is so 90's. People do have camera cellphones.

Then, they made us wait for about two hours before the guys showed up and in buying the tickets they never mentioned the opening acts (some inconsequential artists I really shouldn't have been available for and the lights shouldn't have been turned down for them). They said 7:00 and made us think it would start just around that time, not 8:50. The acoustics were bad, very bad, the synthesizer was set way too sharp, it kept cutting into my ears. The sound quality could have been better and they could have put up two side by side monitors like they did at Maroon 5's concert and the organizers could have stopped thinking it was all about merchandising (they sold everything down to Noodles at the venue) and about the music and organized a much friendlier atmosphere. Apart from that it was great. Every time Nick took the mic we screamed. Just like the old days.

Fort Lauderdale...Part Uno

Coming back from my vacation and a few developments. Yet again another US city where you cannot get around without a car. They had this wonderful sidewalks and the street lights are geared towards encouraging pedestrians but then, the heat was stroke giving, and most of all, the stuff you really want to walk to is miles apart from each other. I did a ton of walking especially in the malls and in the morning I walked to the cafe to have breakfast on the sidewalk, (heavenly if it was not so hot, and I didnt have to wipe off beads of sweat intermittently) and in the evening I walked to and from the bar, avoiding the throes of people half naked and headed to the beach.

I stayed behind an extra day after my family left to spend some time with the city and get my monies worth from that exorbitant plane ticket.

However, I went cheap with the hotel (so that I could spend the money on something else, maybe good dinner) so I stayed at this dump shit motel that just was appalling any which way you look at it. The bed was creaky, the sheet had pubes still attached to it, there was no window and the bathroom was certainly so small that only a kid could fit in. It reminded me of living poor, of having that as your home and having to live like that.
Sometimes we forget how privileged we truly are to afford the kind of living quarters that we get, that just sort of made me miss my flat, my bed and just my general life.
There is so much of a class difference--super rich and dirt poor. The dirt poor live in motels just like the one I stayed in, and then right next to it, like a stone throw away are these high rises overlooking the beach that are 2-3 million dollars. I mean it's great to admire that kind of living maybe for eye candy purposes, just walking to the mall, the streets are lined with vintage cars, amazingly pricey vehicles even I don't know all their names, and then you see dirt poor people waiting for the bus. What is that? It just sort of brings life into some kind of perspective. What would be your motivation if you find yourself on the other side of the class divide, how would you scrunge to get out of it, and hopefully make it.
We took a boat tour in Miami of the stars' homes--P. Diddy, Enrique Iglesias and his dad, Liz Taylor, Jackie Chan, J.Lo, Ricky Martin, Marc Anthony and Will Smith among a few were some of the homes that made an impact. But you start to wonder what kind of culture do we have or are we lacking that we have to tour superstars' homes as opposed to the museum, or some other notable artifact. Then, again that class divide I mentioned is drawn out and essentially demarcated.

On my way there, at the airport actually there were a few soldiers, army personnel I should say, very young, fresh faced and eager waiting for their flight to Pensacola, FL I should assume. They all looked so young, healthy and enthusiastic, quite unlike the image you have of them from the media as being led off to Iraq to die--which I couldn't help thinking to myself. I couldn't help thinking, the next time we see this cheery man that is happily chowing down on his burger, maybe in a body bag. Maybe. Hopefully not, but maybe. I just couldn't let that vision burn me. But they all seemed so happy, fulfilled, as if they were going to do something they were naturally inclined or destined to do, not being led to the slaughter at all.
Just wondered how people like that build up their psyche.

i can't remember

I can't remember some things, so soon after they happened. I can't remember my ride back from work today, was it good, bad, did it rain hard, was the traffic light, were there jerks on the road? I don't remember. I don't remember what kind of day I had unless it was a really hard day, today was since I just got back from my vacation but if you inquire as to what the content of the work was in regard to, I couldn't tell you without mumbling.

I don't remember what the sermons in church were about? As soon as I walk out of there I am totally and completely erased of any memory of what the priest said, what bible passages were read or how I felt when they read them.

I just got back from 3 days in Fort Lauderdale, and I really couldn't tell you what the city is about, I remember that it had no culture apart from sun, sand and water and nothing else. Everything, every store, every joint was named to pay homage to the beach. I can't tell you what inspired the pictures I took or if I was inspired at all. I just don't remember it that well. I remember taking one last look at the ocean before I left abruptly for the airport yesterday morning, in between the sweltering heat and not much else. I just do not remember or rather I choose not to remember so many things. I wonder what my brain is filled with. What fills the void of my nothingness?

However, on to other things. the exams are in about five weeks, I can't say I have been studying so hard. I tried a little over this weekend, but I spent more time not reading than I did reading, and I don't know what is wrong with my brain, I could read a whole lot of topics, spend hours in front of the books reading, and memorizing, and then hours later, or before I go to bed I ponder so what topics did I cover today and I can't seem to get it together. At all.

Six Feet Under last night was really good. It hit the spot. The writing was so intense and delicately done.

Sometimes that show can go off, way off, they spend time on some scenes makes you wonder, why bother with that on a one hour show, we need to see something that matters, makes sense and adds sense to the whole plot. But last night, it all connected. They probably fired the writers from the last couple of shows and brought better writers. I don't know what it is with HBO but they get it right with their shows. It's not overtly envelope-pushing, but it's dynamic work. All their shows, right down to the Lisa Kudrow one that I don't even like and then, of course, there's Entourage, that I hated at first but have grown to admire how exceptional the quick wit is on that show.

It's not TV alright, It's HBO. And one day my show is gonna be on it.

PS I am writing this at work on a notepad, sober and uninspired so excuse how lame it sounds.

shoppers' remorse

Yesterday, I had the sudden urge to return everything I had bought in the last couple of weeks that was unworn, unused with the receipt still intact.
I gathered them, reviewed them and weighed what the actual cost was to me and the fact that in the last two weeks since I bought it I haven't felt the need to use it so I possibly won't miss not having it.

In the end I gave myself back $83. It felt good, you have no idea. I wish I had more items, especially that sun dress that cost $36...hmmmm. still debating on that one, I did review that one along with the rest and I thought, you know, maybe on that hot date, or maybe not cos the odds of a hot date are so far between. I am still contemplating if it will survive another week, $36 back to my account less interest will sure feel good.

That was my July 4th weekend, how was yours?