Women should not "need" men.

I started off this blog to express the joy and peace obtained from living a solo life. 

I sometimes find that women of a certain age, or just women in general have a tendency to "need" men to complete them. Not that I never want for male companionship. I do. I'm not made of steel. I've often expressed that some of my vacations or spontaneous trips might be a bit different if I was accompanied by a male companion. But I don't need men to "complete" me. I am plenty enough for me. I can pay my own bills. I can take myself on vacation by myself and enjoy myself immensely (as you all have observed) and I can choose to cook or not cook, or just be, with me, all day long. 

Men often feel that when you need them for companionship and all its circumstances (ahem, sex) that you need them to pay your bills or to wine and dine you or to generally hold your hand. I know, they expect to be needed and they love women that need them. I want you there but I don't need you to do these things for me. I can do them for myself by myself. If you want to be that gentleman in my life to do them even better but I do not expect it from you and I would hate you more if I find out that you think that I do. I can enjoy my weekend by myself being myself. I do not need to spend the weekend with you dealing with you and all your circumstances (ahem, sex). I would like you to want to spend the weekend with me that would be great but since you want to do you, I want to celebrate me. It's my world and you are invited to be in it. I do not expect it from you and you shouldn't certainly expect it from me either.

One of the few celebrated Beyonce songs that I related to even before I became this single indomitable independent loving life force that I am was Independent Woman - from the Charlie's Angels Theme song. She said paraphrased, "The shoe I'm rocking, I bought it. The house I live in, I bought it. The car I'm driving, I bought it. I depend on me."

Exactly, I depend on me. Not you lover man, me. If I fuck up, I depend on me to fix this life of mine. Not you. That's the way it is, that's the way it should be until we find someone worthy to share this space with us. As I've often said, I am still. Please be still with me. 

This aptly means, I am here. You can be here with me if you choose to. 

Let's celebrate the woman that we are without needing someone to complete us. It's so much more fun this way, trust me.