A little angrier

So on Friday, 09-25-09 at approximately 12.45 pm, I was in a car accident. I was on my way to the hospital for a check up and took a slight detour to buy something, got a little lost and decided to head back to the doctor. Just before my exit we all stopped suddenly and there it was. The guy behind couldn't stop quick enough or was moving way too fast and then, he rammed into me. He rammed into me so hard that I rammed into the guy in front of me. Double whammy. His car was totaled. It ricocheted across the highway and was in smoke. Mine was not so good. It had to be towed out of there.

So here I am without a car all weekend. It was the Atlanta Classic weekend at that. So many parties, so many events that I wanted to force myself to go to, just to get some fresh air. Instead I had to sit home grounded unable to get anywhere tangible and sulk completely, entirely.

The car is still not fixed and I don't know when it will get fixed. I am still being given the run around by the insurance company. They've let me rent a car but a much smaller one at that and it is not even comparable to the car that got semi-totaled. The entire thing is just a nightmare that makes you wish it happened to someone else.

The scary part of this whole thing was that I had a nightmare about that morning. I dreamt that I had let a friend of mine drive back from somewhere. On our way the cars in front of us piled up and I told her to stop immediately. She did, a good distance from them and soon enough, their cars blew up. And we were thankful that we were not that close to the flame. I just remember the horror of seeing human lives burn in front of me. Freaky nightmare. Thankfully, the reality that occurred hours later was not that horrorful. But it still was not a welcome call.

People wonder why I am so sad. Because shit keeps happenning to me. I see some people and all they have is good news to report. They always have a smile on their faces, their lives just keep going according to plan. But for me, it's always the opposite. Like some nightmare. This lends itself to why I am so negative. There's really actually nothing to be positive about.

So this explains the lack of inspiration to keep plowing away at this journal. I know I have a lot to say but I don't even know where to start. How do I start? What do I say that I haven't elaborated on before.