All That Glitters

I'd like to welcome you all to an episode of your favourite show: All That Glitters is Not Gold.

I have been doing a lot of thinking about some things, particularly the job factor. And while I have decided that my ego, my pride and my strong overbearing personality may be to blame for my wanting to move to another job, I have also decided that the other 50% would be attributed to my lack of investigation of the job/company before I made the plunge. The fact that once they dangled dollars in front of my face, I just jumped ship without consideration just showed that I was Shylock's Twin Sister, a close relative of Lady Macbeth. That was one of the main reasons, the fuel for the move, and then, the fact that the old one was not up to par, aka driving me batty, that didn't help neither. I just jumped without asking all the salient questions. This is the part where the "All that Glitters" term comes in.

I had a long drawn out conversation with my sister. You know the one who is afraid to take risks. And though I have taken quite a few risks since she's known me, this is one that has back-fired that has given her cause to give me one of those, "Be Patient, stop taking risks" talk that I despise so much. So I don't believe you should spend eternity in a position when there is no sight of prospect. So I do believe that you should go with your instinct. So I sometimes fail to weigh every single con there is. I just didn't want to have that talk with her. I have, successfully, with the help of a lot of prayer avoided it. Now it just had to come because of this.

I also think part of the reason that all this is happening is because I made a few promises to God that I failed to fulfill once all these fell into place. Not good. He never forgets. Never. So now, I am just gonna have to pick up the pieces of those promises and retrace my steps to them.

You can tell I have done a lot of thinking about this. You start to ask yourself, is it so hard to be happy in a job. I think the very nature of work is that it sucks. It's just something you hate and you get to despise it. Because it is WORK, it's not play. You're not meant to love it. I haven't met any everyday person who loves their job, not even my sister the "safety-haven" person. However, there are people, I know a mere handful (mostly actors) that actually love what they do for a living. I want to be in that handful. Really?! 

KR in his Matrix documentary used to want to train on Sundays (even though they were closed on Sundays) and that just blew me away. That means, a) he loved it so much that he wanted to be at work on a Sunday and, b) he wanted to be good at it, better at it. I want to get to that level with what I do. I pray to be at that level. Is it a life challenge that I just don't want to go with the flow of this day to day, craving the weekend, and cursing Mondays?

I have a lot more to say on this and my thought process, but I'll save that for the next episode of All That Glitters...