Surprisingly....updating from work

I haven't felt like writing in a long time. It's not like I haven't had things to write about, stuff happens to me all the time that is noteworthy of being put into words. but I feel like the second I try to write them down, I know that my mind would want to say several things at the same time and in that lose sight of the goal and in the end it would be a "hot mess" on paper. So that's why I haven't written in forever. Let's see I had my first phone interview on Monday with a recruiter in DC. Did not go very well. it never goes very well. Most recruiters do not know anything about international law so it just messes things up royally. So that was a waste.

Then, on Tuesday my computer broke down. My hard drive was fried and all my work, writing, pictures etc was in jeopardy. So that was a devastating set of events even though I was surprised at how calm I was. Maybe because I have another computer, even though it does not contain all my "work", I was seemingly calm and just not in touch with the "devastation" so to speak. I was just numb. maybe because worse events have befallen me and I was glad this was not one of them. Wednesday I was able to find a place to drop it off. But Wednesday was quite a disappointing day. I remember sitting on my couch at night and wondering just how utterly disappointing the day was. I haven't quite had enough disappointments. It was like a crooked day. A day when you want tog o a certain direction but you end going the other way.
That disappointing. I had a dinner with the communications committee of the women's group and nothing happened. The dinner was bad. The food was bad, my demeanor was out of whack and the dinner cut into my night time so that made it equally bad. Then, there was Thursday when my computer got fixed. But then, something happened in the middle of the day at work that just got my morale bad. I need to put together a writing sample, more than anything. I need to get out of this dribble. I have all this scholarly knowledge and all I do is ask "legal" for permission to do stuff all day long. I cannot understand it. I cannot understand why I am so "not successful" in the one thing I want to be successful in. So today is Friday, and I promised I would write in something today just because I have to get back into writing so that with writing I can one day draft my writing sample that I have put off for so long. And maybe just maybe I will know if I am any good at this.