My life is a mess dot com
That should be the name of my website, my web domain, because that is my reality.
It's like this whole big sham, fumble, awful circumstance that just keeps going and going on, fumes no doubt, and hardly ever lets up. Lately, I've been feeling as if I was cursed from some generation. I asked my mother about this but she mumbled, like there's something there but she would rather not talk about it. My dad's parents died within months of each other one from a broken heart from having to continue life without the other. The first one, from poison. Uncanny, stuff of movies leads you to think what a crazy family.
If it's not a curse then what the heck is it? Everything in my life is in turmoil. My personal life and my professional life. I would accept this if I was lazy and a no good bum that just wallowed in self-pity. But no, I work hard. I work hard to look good, stay in shape, to eat right, dress right, just so I look good. I work hard to go out meet people, hoping to bump into "the one," both professionally and personally, that would somewhat change my circumstance.
I work hard professionally. I study in school, to graduate college and then my Masters, to continually search for and apply to jobs on the Internet. I work hard in my current job. But still my mess continues. No matter how hard I try.
Lately, I've been feeling like everyone's cut me off. I write emails to people and they don't respond. I send texts and still no response. I go out, dressed in my finest, fully made up and no one talks to me. No one even asks me my name. Like there's a steel cage in front of me and they would rather not penetrate it.
If it is a hex, what gives, at what time does it let up? How do I find out if it can, what do I need to do for it to let up?
I can't even talk to people about this because, people that don't have problems, the worst thing you can do is go tell them your problem. They don't want to hear all that. "Please get on with your hexed self and be gone."
That should be the name of my website, my web domain, because that is my reality.
It's like this whole big sham, fumble, awful circumstance that just keeps going and going on, fumes no doubt, and hardly ever lets up. Lately, I've been feeling as if I was cursed from some generation. I asked my mother about this but she mumbled, like there's something there but she would rather not talk about it. My dad's parents died within months of each other one from a broken heart from having to continue life without the other. The first one, from poison. Uncanny, stuff of movies leads you to think what a crazy family.
If it's not a curse then what the heck is it? Everything in my life is in turmoil. My personal life and my professional life. I would accept this if I was lazy and a no good bum that just wallowed in self-pity. But no, I work hard. I work hard to look good, stay in shape, to eat right, dress right, just so I look good. I work hard to go out meet people, hoping to bump into "the one," both professionally and personally, that would somewhat change my circumstance.
I work hard professionally. I study in school, to graduate college and then my Masters, to continually search for and apply to jobs on the Internet. I work hard in my current job. But still my mess continues. No matter how hard I try.
Lately, I've been feeling like everyone's cut me off. I write emails to people and they don't respond. I send texts and still no response. I go out, dressed in my finest, fully made up and no one talks to me. No one even asks me my name. Like there's a steel cage in front of me and they would rather not penetrate it.
If it is a hex, what gives, at what time does it let up? How do I find out if it can, what do I need to do for it to let up?
I can't even talk to people about this because, people that don't have problems, the worst thing you can do is go tell them your problem. They don't want to hear all that. "Please get on with your hexed self and be gone."
So I write about it and hope that total strangers reading this will pray for this total stranger online that they don't know and hope that something lets up.
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