An Anita Writes Birthday

The Obligatory Birthday Post. 

This year was tough. I didn't have to work. I actually took a vacation so I could just, be, for myself and my birthday. The entire scene was set but yet I wasn't looking forward to it. All that I had anticipated fell through about 2 weeks prior and it left me with a ho-hum feeling in my chest, still hoping with the slightest dimmest flicker that something out of the ordinary would take over.

Yet...it didn't.

It reminded me of one of my favorite episodes of "Sex and the City" (Season 4, episode 1 to be exact), it was Carrie's 35th birthday and she had nurtured an uncertain unhappiness at adding another year to her already burdened lonesome life, and after all the efforts to make her transition easier and less painful, it didn't work out that well. In fact she ended up having a thoroughly shitty day, where everything and anything went wrong and it caused her to re-evaluate her life. Where had her past 35 years taken her thus far?

Instead of boring you with my nothingness birthday celebration - I'm certain we all have those from time to time - below is an extract of one of my first birthday posts. Those were good times, weren't they? I would work on my birthday knowing that my birthday would be celebrated at work (not at my expense but at my friends, colleagues, families expense) and I would come home to a small birthday cake gathering and of course, being the summer, there would be a new movie being released to usher in the evening after all the cake and wine. Go to bed rested, warm and fuzzy from all the love and light shed my way. 

To better birthdays.

June 6, 2003 - 

I am not drunk and, strangely enough, I didn't drink that much and what's so fascinating is that I actually had fun. Still, you know I couldn't let such a memorable day like this go by without putting in an update on the days' events and just saying thank you to God for His wonderful mercies and for His unique way of answering my prayer and letting me know He's got my back.

I went to work feeling a little weird. I was just hoping no one would make a fuss about me, and thankfully they didn't. It was my birthday right? What do I do? How can I get any work done at all? But I did just a little bit but to me I wasn't the only one not really ready to work, my co-workers were ready to leave that place and head to the restaurant faster than I was. 

We went to a fancy restaurant downtown. For once we mingled with the rich and the spoiled. Then, they handed me my present a gift card, which I didn't want to open because I really do not open my presents in front of people. However, it was fun, I am feeling rather worn out now and sluggish, comes with turning an age, so I don't really have the energy to type out the play by play of today's events. All I know is, I had fun, the gifts from my co-workers were touching, and the love around me is really what I needed. I thank God for it, and I rejoice for it.

Happy Birthday to Me!