I swear, I had something really intelligent to say, but it escapes my mind right now. The last few days have been extremely emotional and crippliing, so much I didn't want to work out. I just wanted to sit there and wallow, and wonder where was I when I wasted all this time doing nothing.
I found out that a couple of my old classmates have achieved and even surpassed their dreams. One is a lecturer, getting her double Masters in Stanford, One just shot her independent movie, with a new husband and her degree from NY Film School, and the others are working in Shell Oil, etc. And me, what am I doing? Throwing this pity-party apparently. Dodging Boss's day and just sick to my stomach that I didn't get to decide what I wanted to do and just do it. I keep remembering the conversation I had with my sister when I first moved here. Yes, I want to be a writer. Do you know how many writers there are in this country that are struggling to make it, you would just implode with the rest of them. And I thought, you know, you are right? That was way before I knew that I should never listen to her.
I knew I had something to say. I just am not sure if I want to say it.
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