An Artists Haven

I want to move to New York so bad, it's almost overwhelming.

I know no place is ever as great as you imagine it to be - look at America. I just think it'd be wonderful. As an artist where else will you live and feel inspired and nurtured by the environment. It's overwhelming, I say. I suppose there are people in New York that are just dying to move to Atlanta and enjoy the cheap housing, the easy commute and the slow, hush-puppy lifestyle. I actually sat next to one of them at lunch. "I just wanted to get away from the hustle and bustle." I felt like slapping her. Hustle and bustle keeps you moving, invigorates you, lets you know that you're alive. How can you want to step back from that?

I wish I had a best friend who shared my same yearn for life in New York, so we could move there together and keep each other company as we find our feet. This is unfortunately one adventure I cannot embark on by myself. Even though I was able to muster 2 days in New York by myself, living there on my own seems so daunting. Plus, there is the evil shadow of unemployment and constant recession. How can you battle that on your own? How can anyone? But I must often remind myself of how old I am. I am not but a child. There are people my age who are not only responsible for themselves, but the lives of others, their children. Imagine if I were a mother of 2, with no husband who had to relocate to New York. What would happen then?

I have worked in the same place, lived in the same place and driven the same car for 2 years. All that sameness is wearing me out and I am about to burst. I don't know how people deal with sameness. The life of the same, not the ordinary, just the same is underwhelming. How do married people cope?

Every time I read the New York Times or the poets weekly and there's an announcement about another great event in Brooklyn and the rest I would always think, so what am I waiting for? What are you waiting for Anita?

I just need the God of all things prosperous, of tremendous opportunity, and most of all hope, to have pity on me and let me muster enough courage to move to New York, with all things being equal.