For Colored Girls and Solo Weekends

The post below is culled from my personal journal in the Fall of 2008. 

I had just come out of one of those, "Are we exclusive or are we not?" sort of nonsensical dating arrangements and I suddenly had my weekends free. The thing with being single is your weekends are yours. Yours to do whatever it is that needs to be done, or not done. They are just free - not unless you have to work weekends. But you have them free to live the single life rocks lifestyle. Free weekends is actually something most married people envy about us single folks. And every chance I get I rub it in their faces. However, when you meet someone and you start the dance towards dating suddenly your weekends are no longer free. You plan your weekends around whatever plans both of you may have. Before you know it, you get used to it - the "us" that does stuff together on the weekends. That's the part I hate. The part where you've just started to get used to that person's company and then, they just disappear. What's the solution? Just try to jump back into those hobbies that used to occupy your weekends. For me, it's Art - Plays, museums, exhibition openings, etc. Do a complete nose dive, don't even hesitate or brood a moment longer. Immerse yourself in those hobbies and with time, you should be back to your former self.

So when a former colleague of mine suggested that I see the play For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf, by Ntozake Shange I just jumped at it. I didn't know anything about the play. Had read no reviews, nothing. I just knew it was within my price range, playing close to home and something that I really needed to get back into me and reclaim my solo weekends. 

The play turned out to be all that and more - just what the doctor ordered. After the play I took myself out to dinner cos' that's what solo gals do. We do dinner and a play.

Taken from my journal September 1, 2008:

Went to see the wonderful play, For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow is Enuf at the 14th street playhouse on Sunday afternoon directed by the lovely Jasmine Guy. "Yes, I spent an afternoon at the Theater," as Ms. Guy aptly termed it, in her sophisticated Southern drawl as she directed us to kindly turn off our cellphones so we could completely indulge in the play.

I must say, I enjoyed the play immensely. Apparently, this play was written by a feminist lady in the feminist time of the 70's. I had no idea that it's been around for that long. A former colleague forwarded the flyer to me and now, I am glad she did. At first I didn't know what to make of the stories told in short poems, the Southern accent seemed to loose me now and then, but once I got into it, I knew this was for me. I felt like I was being revolutionized, like I was part of some new age female movement to empower women with dignity and self-respect. It felt good! The play is basically about 7 strong black women dealing with life's trials. I didn't necessarily relate it to being black because I feel the pain of loss, heartbreak, rape, physical and mental abuse, etc, are dealt by all women. I've always been black and I have always dealt with these problems so I don't necessarily feel these problems are personal to me because of my color. They are universal female struggles.

I wish I remembered every bit of the play. I just remember bits and pieces of it here and there, certain lines here and there just sort of stayed with me. There was this particular poem that said, paraphrasing, "Someone stole something from me, and I let them steal it, I was right there when it happened." People don't hurt you or break your heart unless you let them, and you are right there when it happens.

That is so true.

I feel like buying a copy of the book for every woman I've ever known, black or white.