Always wanting one and trying not to alienate anyone in my life by getting one, I finally decided that it's my life, so why not, if not, fuck it to the world and I went ahead and got one. I sat and waited for about 2 hours for a 30 minute session of 5 ladybugs that hurt like shit. As soon as it was done, I knew it. I knew that I may get another one. And after the second one, I was definitely hooked. It was so liberating.
I was trying to describe the feeling to someone who asked me why I feel the need to get so many since I have an office job and I'm supposed to be this ambitious demure lady. I couldn't quite put it into words. It's like this:
I feel like a superhero looking all professional at work and then having a completely different persona outside the office. It helps me cope with working in an office and being cooped up in a cubicle all day where I wear boring clothes and cover up my arms and legs, and pull my hair back. It's like it's my alter ego and then when I am in my personal life I let my freak flag fly. I feel like its my little secret.
I often used to do this, maybe wear a blonde wig or an afro wig over the weekend, to be this other persona who lets loose and doesn't live by the rules. This is my way of rebelling in a subtle artistic way. To those that judge, they really don't understand and no matter how many words I say I may never make them understand. But this is me now…so deal with it.
No comments:
Post a Comment